Dear Bro. Fuston,
I am like someone locked up in a bottle who needs air to stay alive. I am convinced that talking to you about my problem will bring about that needed air of freedom to me.
My father was a chronic womanizer. While my mother and my four siblings lived in Owerri, I was staying with father at Port Harcourt where he worked until his death two years ago as a Company Sales Manager.
We visited home at intervals during weddings, burials or festivals. Those days in Port Harcourt my father had about three mistresses and one of them must come to be with him every night, in fact one of them assisted me so much to get my first paid job.
I started out like dad when I got an apartment of my own, and since then I have been doing the same thing. I cannot remember a night I slept without a woman by my side, sometime when I travel the first thing I will do is to look for a place where I can get a girl that will keep me company for the nights I will be in the new place. There are times I don’t even have sex with them, at such times I make do with holding the girl closely to myself.
I have also noticed that I cannot keep a steady relationship, the girls usually quarrel and most often desert me when they find out that I am having other affairs. This has made me to constantly search for companions because each time there is trouble between me and the girls, I will immediately commence search for replacements.
On my own I have tried to sleep alone, but each time I try this, I will be awake all night and can recall everything that happened that night.
I have made effort to see if this can stop but my effort never produced any positive result.
Sometimes I feel it is my life and I can live the way that pleases me, at other times I feel empty and worthless.
Now I am 38 years, my immediate younger brother who is 35 years is married with two children but it has not occurred to me to get married. Could this my life style be the cause?
Honestly, I have not had any major set back, but my worry increased when I began feeling hollow lately each morning I wake up with different girls on my bed and I cannot in all sincerity say if I actually love any of them. I have this empty feeling, yet I cannot on my own sleep without holding unto a woman. Could this be a kind of sickness? I need your help.
Stanley Uzo from Port Harcourt.
Indeed you are sick. You brought the sickness upon yourself with the help of your father. I said you are sick because if you are not, you cannot be having a worthless feeling. You toed the path of unrighteousness and I believe you wouldn’t make it a generational problem by letting your own offspring into that dark path.
You may have spent fortunes maintaining this array of women. That you have not noticed a major set-back in your life is because you are inwardly blind. Take time to consider your expenditures on women. Then you will find out that you are stagnating instead of making progress.
Have you also taken time to put into cognizance the health implications of having multiple sexual partners?
If you are that lucky not to have contracted any sexual disease by now, you may not be lucky next time. It is very irresponsible to have numerous sexual liaisons.
Those that know that you are associated with this kind of life may be hailing you in mockery and can never trust you with any responsibility.
It is very disheartening and unfortunate that you studied under the feet of a wrong master-your father.
But you can change for good if you earnestly desire positive change.
The life of fornication or adultery in the case of married people makes one empty and worthless. You are empty because the spirit of God leaves immediately one finds himself committing this sin.
You are exposed to lots of dangers because a man that sleeps with women not married to him hardly prays or reads the Bible to get inspiration. And a human being is doomed without inspiration.
You have not thought of marriage even when your younger ones are getting married because you receive illegally the services women render to their husbands. How then can you marry?
My dear, you are obsessed, and there is nothing you can do about it until you allow Jesus into your life.