Dear Bro. Fuston
Compliments of the season. I have elected to bare my mind to you since I can no longer continue to keep the issue to myself. It has been troubling me and I have been sick for the same reason and that is why I want to speak to you about it.
Another thing is that, I wouldn’t know what you will make of me; you may probably consider me wayward or loose. This is about my future and happiness.
I am aware you have been assisting othersI know you will help me in the right direction.
I vowed not to have anything to do with a man that cannot give me sexual satisfaction. I took that decision because each time I am given what I may describe as half-inch satisfaction, I tend to be angry throughout the rest of that day, sometimes for days and on many occasions I have transferred this aggression.
I am also someone that hates to begin a thing without concluding it. Sex for me should have a good beginning and a pleasurable or memorable end.
Honestly, I can’t explain exactly how this guy overwhelmed me, and I became madly in love with him, to the point that I cannot easily wish him out of my life. There may not have been any need writing to you if I am not head over heels in love with this guy.
The funniest thing is that it’s just about four months ago that we became lovers and he is already making efforts to marry me.
He is handsome, well-built and presents himself a typical gentleman and that was why I did not disturb myself about him not asking for sex after some months of pleasant moments like other men would do.
Recently, one early Saturday morning, I went to a gym where he trains to see him and after training, we drove to his house, not long we entered his apartment, he kissed me and excused himself to shower, after some minutes, I cannot say what exactly came over me and I walked up to the bathroom and opened the door, I saw him naked and it was here that I noticed that his manhood is very small, just as small as that of a three-year-old boy, he did not do anything , but I discovered from his body language that he was ashamed. We are still together.
Since that day, I noticed there are some unusual things he does which suggests guilt.
I have had harrowing experiences with a friend that has the same size with my current guy; I was able to discharge him because I wasn’t so deeply in love with him.
In this case, I am so much in love with him. I love him, I love the way he dresses, love his decent approach to issues, I love his family and would have loved to marry him, but honestly, I don’t see that small thing in-between his legs giving me the satisfaction I want.
We might end up quarreling every time and this is not what I wish for myself in marriage. Money or no money, food or no food, I deserve my happiness. Can I get it from him? Is there any way it can happen?
Queeneth, in Owerri
Happy New Year to you. There is no way I can consider you to be loose, I even applaud you for finding the courage to let someone who will assist you solution to your predicament. Some people in your shoes may not have had such courage to write to me.
Moreover, this column is for people facing relationship or emotional problems. Don’t deride yourself, you did not do the unthinkable.
I do not want to blame you for opening the door to your guy’s bathroom, but you should have done that with his consent, bearing in mind that you two are yet to be married. I think it’s an error on your part and he, your guy, deserves an apology, though he may not have asked for it, but for decency sake, you can apologize to him for being too inquisitive. You pried on him, and I think if you apologize for that act, his respect for you will increase.
Like you posited, good sex is one of the things that relaxes the body and helps to put marriages on the proper footing. I concur with you totally. But the higher truth in this matter is that, though good sex in marriage is good, it is not the only thing that keeps marriages strong.
You have noted some good qualities of this guy; can you because he is not endowed with a huge manhood discredit the other qualities? Remember he did not create himself the way he is, God did and we should try and maximize God’s gift because He has put potentials in all his creation.
Let me tell you that the pleasure and satisfaction you so desire is not found in the size of a man’s penis, and that is the reason why I said we must try and put in adequate use, whatever God has blessed us with, be it big or small.
I am not wrong to say that your mind is fixated on penile satisfaction, that is the basis of sex for you and the reason why you appear unchanging to the issue.
The truth is that the man is so gifted that his word, if he knows how to piece them can be a turn-on to his wife let alone parts of his body.
Begin now to change your mindset about conjugal pleasure and satisfaction and I bet you, your home will be a paradise here on earth. The act of sex between a man and his wife should not be seen as a battle where the winner takes all, rather, it should be seen as a union of two people that share mutual love with a good understanding. Whatever thing you have, you two must share together no matter how big or small.
I may not be doing you any good if I tell you to go ahead and refuse marrying this guy whom you described as nice, simply because God did not fashion his manhood to be as big as the leg.
However, the choice is still yours, you are to take the final decision, but if I were to be Queeneth, I cannot reject a man I love dearly because his penis is small, especially when I know that there are other ways of being happy.
Thank you, and have a wonderful weekend.